Quo vadis?

Celebrated Croatian skier Janica Kostelić recently stated in a TV show that success doesn’t make a person and that she would be quite satisfied with far more modest results than the ones she was regularly achieving in her prime. I find a lot of wisdom in these words, although finding success in music greatly differs from achieving the same in sport. Anyhow, thinking of this, I conclude that success is primarily a thing of social expectations and pressure rather than someone's primary and only goal in life. Life should be about the journey rather than about the destination, right?

Although I devoted my life to music and art, I still don’t have much to show in a formal sense. Financially, I mostly make ends meet while official awards go to those who are part of the chosen circles. Many would probably throw in the towel in my place already, but I’m still chasing my windmills. After all, music and art are what I was born to do and the best I can offer as a person.

I may not be successful in a traditional sense, but I have many times received proof of my talent and potential. Every composition, performance, collaboration, competition, and the words of those who are aware of my work are a testament to this. I’m proud of everything I achieved over the years while pursuing music, most of the time without help and understanding of the people around me. A long-time bandmate of mine once said: “You did everything you could and should have; now it’s somebody else’s turn.”

It seems that for people like me, there are no problems or doubts these days, thanks to the Internet. It offers countless possibilities and options, like placing your music on streaming services, various production libraries, collaboration with artists and musicians from around the world, to music for film and media. But to truly profit from all this, you need to change yourself from an artist to an entrepreneur, which I simply don’t want to. Furthermore, I don’t wish to face rejection and further disappointment due to the overpopulation of the Internet and those who have a more attractive background. I may be a romantic fool, but I sincerely believe that many great artists from the past simply got lucky to be noticed by someone relevant, and the rest is history.

It is often said that the talented ones shouldn’t keep their talent all for themselves but share it with others. This is exactly what I’ve been doing for years now. My modest presence on the Internet is an attempt to tell my story and to show that I exist and what I’m capable of. I have generously shared numerous compositions with the world, many of which I’m very proud of. But I won’t tug anyone by their sleeve. I leave the next step to them.

The last year brought me many disappointments but also some small victories. I have finished dozens of new pieces and expanded my creative horizons. The fact that I stayed true to music and creativity despite everything shows that I already have what I should have, regardless of how difficult things often are for me. For those still missing, I can only hope for some help on the side and from above.